We are all born to be our own worst enemy. We are masters at sabotaging ourselves from the inside out and the question is, why do we do it? Why do we get in our own way? Why does it seem like some people are brilliant and gifted at sailing through life’s tsunamis and we succumb to the doubt, the projection upon us by others and our own fears?
We manifest these spiritual issues in ways that cause us to feel insecure, vulnerable and in need of protection. Don’t get me wrong, there are many things that we need protection from in this world, there are many cosmic and worldwide life lessons that can destroy our well being. Odds are that if you live in America (or another 1st world country) and have the ability to read this internet article, you are more likely to create your current need for protection from your own inner saboteur and from your own fears and vulnerabilities.
When you work protection issues from the inside out, you are building lifelong security.
We all write the script for our future selves by the choices we are making today. Are we choosing to blame outside interference for our shortcomings? Are we buying into the whiney voice of our vulnerabilities and believing that we are defined by them? Are we listening to your judgement or fears of the people around us and taking them on as our own? These choices that usually result in the inner dialog that says, “I can’t”, “I’m broken”, “I am only worthy of this small amount.” These inner dialogs are the openings that abusers, bullies and perpetrators of violence look for to worm their way in through.
When you work on those inner voices and transform your self-doubt into strength your protection magic becomes impenetrable.
My clients, friends and my own personal experiences express this natural law of the universe over and over and over again. That what you believe, your inner voice, will manifest in your outer world. Our entire existence is about proving what we believe about ourselves and we can see it play out all around us.
You can see it in a day filled with irritation and inconvenience. Things that normally are non-issues become part of a cosmic conspiracy to ruin a perfectly good day. The only thing it proves is that at one point in your day’s frustration you decided that this would be a bad day. The errant alarm clock, rushed and burnt breakfast and the 20 minute traffic jam blocking your way to work become the catalyst for everything going wrong that day.
Imagine that train of thinking when it comes to your personal safety?
Negative energy is sent to you all the time. You send negative energy to others all the time. Jealousy, irritation, inconvenience, intimidation, more success than the other, abandonment, are all things that can spark negative thoughts that get sent along the psychic phone lines. This negative energy can be just a touch of static, or you can become a magnet that causes it to collect until you break.
People will attack you purposefully and energetically, but the big question is why? Why you? Why now? What purpose does this pain fulfill in your life and what script did your past-self write for you to manifest?
No one attacks your strengths - that would be a waste of time and ineffective use of energy. It is at your vulnerable points that this negativity will collect and become that beacon that calls more and more negative energy to you, sometimes in the form of an abuser and physical harm (aka, attacks). This issue can go deep, can have begun in childhood as a learned behavior, can be karmic and have lifetimes of legacy. Don’t expect to heal this whole tangle of fears, doubts and vulnerabilities with one meditation and candle burning. For me, this has been part of my lifelong healing journey.
When it is time to face your own worst enemy, do it with compassion and introspection. That enemy is you and you are sending yourself a message. It may be a broken message, but you must explore it, find its origin and the story of your life.
When you are feeling the need for protection take the steps needed to protect yourself. Don’t psychoanalyze your attacker, get yourself to safety and stay protected. Dig deep after all the doors and windows are locked. Dig deep after you have calmed down and allowed your adrenaline to re-balance. But, dig deep so you don’t have to do this over and over again.
Lock-it Down Protection spell –
Protection Blessed Herbal Candle
Fiery Wall of Protection Oil
Anoint the Protection candle with the Fiery Wall of Protection oil, say the blessing and light the candle in the center of your space. Put several drops of Fiery Wall of protection oil into a medium sized bowl of warm water. Using a fresh cloth, wipe down the exterior of your doors, including the handle and the threshold. Place 9 more drops of Fiery Wall of Protection oil directly onto your threshold.
Wipe down the interior of all of your window frames and any portal between the outside and inside world. Take your candle and walk clockwise around your house, shining the candle flame in each window and repeating the blessing in every direction.
Take a square of white cloth (a coffee filter will do in a pinch) and let the molten wax pour into the center. As the wax begins to cool, press each forefinger and thumb into the wax, leaving your fingerprint. Wrap that up and carry that with you for the next week. Relight the candle every day until it is consumed and never leaving a burning candle unattended.
Shoring-up Your Vulnerabilities Spell –
Truth and Justice Blessed Herbal Candle
Problem Solving Blessed Herbal Candle
Healing Blessed Herbal Candle
Make a hard copy of a picture of you. Make sure you are the only one in the image. Cut that out and put it in the center of a letter size piece of paper. With a black sharpie, draw a large circle around you – almost to the edge of the paper. This is a circle of protection where you can explore your vulnerabilities without them being exploited further.
Light a Truth and Justice, a Problem Solving and a Healing Blessed Herbal Candle. Using a pencil, start writing inside the circle what your vulnerabilities are. This is not a 5 minute process. This takes time, often days of contemplation, to really get below the surface of what is really driving your fear bus.
Ask yourself these questions:
If my fears could talk to me, what are the 10 things they would tell me?
What would life be like without these fears?
What things in my life do they prevent me from doing?
Who in my life feeds my fears and pokes at my vulnerabilities?
Why do I let them?
It’s ok if you write on the back, or tiny, or over your own writing. When you are all done, you are going to color over what you wrote with the black sharpie to protect them from being seen and taken advantage of. Then you are going to pour the molten wax over your paper, covering you and everything you wrote.
Every time you pour the wax, you are going to declare which of your strengths is going to protect that vulnerability and help heal it.
You can do this over and over again. Make many copies of your picture and do this one vulnerability at a time. This is wonderful way to dive deeper, one inch at a time.
When you are done with that paper, tuck it away in a box that you will lovingly protect – showing your inner child that you will protect all those vulnerabilities you unearthed.
Keep it magic!!